working from a one-bedroom apartment with a baby and nanny, people keep quitting, and more

This post was written by Alison Green and published on Ask a Manager .
It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go…
1. Working from a one-bedroom apartment with a baby and nanny
I work in tech and have worked remotely for my whole career. I live in a one-bedroom apartment and my desk is tucked into a corner of the living room. This setup has worked great for the past five years, living with my husband. We had our first child three months ago and my maternity leave is ending soon. We have in-home childcare arranged (combo of nanny and grandparents).
I want to continue breastfeeding my child and I’m wondering what you think of trying to work from home in my situation. The (maybe ridiculous) logic is that pumping would take at least as long as just feeding him directly, and would be much less fun. Of course we would have backup options for when meetings conflicted with feeding times. My job is less than 20% meetings, and I can take calls from the common spaces in my building.
The two downsides I see are: it would be harder to get deep focus time, which is part of my role, and I’m not sure how unprofessional it will seem. I started this role three months before my parental leave and made a good impression, but I know I’m kind of starting fresh after being out for so long.
I do have other options for workspaces, but they are far enough away (5-10 minutes) from home that I would have to figure out other milk logistics.
I would very much appreciate your thoughts — are there other important downsides I’m missing? Is it just postpartum hormones convincing me that this is reasonable?
Oooooh. It’s going to be really hard to work in a one-bedroom apartment while your baby and nanny/family members are there. Maybe if you could work in the bedroom with the door closed and a clear agreement not to disturb you … but it’s going to be pretty tough. Working from the living room with that set-up sounds nearly impossible, unless they’re going to be away from home for most of the day every single day. It’s not just noise; it’s the close proximity and being aware of everything that’s going on (some of which you are going to have Opinions on).
If you’ve got an option for a workspace five minutes away, that seems pretty good in comparison.
2. I’m a new manager and people keep quitting
I’m about four months into a new executive role, overseeing a small team of knowledge workers. When I started, there were 12 of us. Today, we’re down to eight.
The previous team lead had a very different style than I do. More hands-off, from what I’ve heard. People were frustrated with the lack of guidance and team development. So that’s what I’ve focused on. All the feedback I’ve received from my team has been positive or, at worst, constructive. But I realize they may not be totally forthcoming with complaints.
The first couple of resignations were easy to blame on my predecessor. They were probably already job hunting when I took over. But now, I’m starting to worry that it’s my fault. I know there aren’t enough details here for you to confirm or deny that fear. But, I wonder if you were in my shoes, how would you figure it out? What would you do to preserve the team that’s still standing?
Talk to people! A lot of people won’t give candid feedback to their managers even if it’s explicitly requested, so you have to shape the questions strategically to draw it out of people. For example: If you could change one thing about your job or your team, what would you change? If you could change something about our workflow, what would it be? How would you improve the way we do X? Etc. The more specific you can be, the more likely you are to get honest and useful answers. Also, if you have any gut feelings about areas that might be problems, ask about those; for example, if you’re worried people think you’re too hands-on, ask about that: “I know when Jane was here, people were frustrated that they weren’t getting enough guidance. When trying to address that, there’s always a risk that the pendulum could feel like it’s swung too far in the other direction. How are you feeling on that front?”
Keep in mind, though, that it’s possible that a lot of the team started job-searching while the old manager was still there, and that could be producing offers now — in other words, it might not be that they’re fleeing you, but that this is a natural part of the aftermath of a difficult manager.
Related:
how to get your staff to be more honest with you
3. Video interviews with a group of competing candidates
What fresh hell is this?
Fortunately, it’s not a hell that I myself am living in, but a dear friend of mine is.
She’s applying for highly paid, highly skilled, fully remote sales roles and she told me that it’s now standard practice in this industry for the early interview rounds to be via video call (okay so far), as a group (NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE NIGHTMARE).
The usual format appears to be eight candidates, each answering four questions (not sure if they all get the same questions; I presume they do) over three minutes. And when it’s not your turn to talk, you sit and listen to the other candidates answer their questions whilst you wait for the sweet release of death.
The kicker? These companies are selling it as a bonus because it allows candidates with a less traditional background to “shine” beyond their resume and experience, which is absolutely impossible to achieve in any other format than a group video interview. They then whittle the pool of candidates down to three, at which point you’re allowed the privilege of a personal video call. Am I right in thinking that this is totally bonkers?
Anyway, I must be off as I have a busy day. Rather than going on separate dates with the men I matched with on dating apps (who has the time?), I’ve invited them all to the same bar at the same time so that I can quickly whittle the pool down to the ones that are worthy of a solo meetup.
Yep, utterly bonkers. And the alleged rationale doesn’t make any sense — there’s nothing about answering questions in front of a group of competitors that would allow non-traditional candidates to “shine” any more than answering those same questions in a one-on-one interview. It’s just faster for the interviewers if they can block off a single time slot and force all their candidates into it together. It’s ridiculous.
Mildly related:
I was held hostage and insulted at a group interview of 45 people
should we have job candidates do group activities with each other?
4. Should I apply for a job with the possibility of a large pay cut?
I’ve been in my current job for over a decade. It’s a good job, I like and get along with my boss and coworkers, I have PTO and medical insurance for me and my spouse. But I am burnt out​, and would like to be doing almost anything else as long as it’s something​ else.
My very first job fresh out of college 20 years ago (sigh) was in a field that I loved. But I did not want to go right back to school and get the graduate degree that might have helped me in that field, and so drifted into my current job after a few years. Now a full-time position in my original field has opened up near me, the first one I’ve seen advertised in years, and I am excited at the thought. From my past experience, I know the job would offer PTO benefits more or less equivalent to what I have now, and probably medical insurance for my spouse and I would be cheaper! However, the salary listing starts at $10K less than I’m currently making, and goes up to only slightly more than my current annual salary. The listing also mentions that any hires will start on the lower range of the salary, and be eligible for merit-based raises and bonuses every year depending on their work.
Is this worth applying for? Even if I’m able to argue for my past experience, that was long ago, and I doubt they would immediately jump to the higher end of the salary spectrum if I asked. We have a mortgage, we have bills to pay, everything is expensive right now, and I don’t know if the benefits would outweigh the serious pay cut.
Apply and see. Part of this depends on what you’re earning now; a $10K paycut is very different if you’re earning $45,000 than if you’re earning $145,000. If you’re closer to the latter, I’d say that cut is absolutely worth it to get out of a field you’re burned out on and back to a field you love. If your salary is closer to the former, it’s probably not — but it’s still worth applying and seeing if you can get them close to your current salary. Maybe you can’t — but if this the first opening in the field you’ve seen in years, it seems silly not to apply and at least see what’s possible.
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